Marriage

When growing up, we thought that once you were married you would live your happily ever after and all your problems would magically go away. Well, sadly this is not the case. Getting married is just the beginning of a whole new set of challenges and trials that you and your husband or wife will face together. However, it is not all bad because you will be going through it with the person that you love and trust. The first few challenges you will face as a couple is while planning your wedding. Challenges such as stress, frustration, debt, and family drama. In an article titled Are You Sacrificing a Perfect Relationship for a Perfect Wedding? It says, "Wedding planning leaves many couples at-risk of placing form over content. In other words, you can shift your concentration to everything looking perfect and away from actually being great in your relationship. Exhausting yourself with organizing a wedding can take its toll on intimacy. The “your day” mentality surrounding the occasion may feel good at first, but it’s important not to let the occasion become all about you. Planning the event should always come second to enjoying this time with your partner." People often tend to get hung up on the details of a one-day affair instead of focusing on the actual reason this whole thing is happening in the first place. The way that a couple can switch this mindset is by planning the wedding with each other. Instead of just the bride and mothers planning it. This allows a couple to get closer together and learn more about each other. Another thing is that you should not have the mind-set of having a wedding to "put on a show". In other words, don't plan a wedding to impress others or prove something to someone. Instead, think about the actual purpose of the wedding, which is to unite two people and their families together. On the other hand, if done well, wedding planning can actually bring a couple closer together and will allow them to start their marriage off with a beautiful memory. After the wedding is when things really start getting crazy. In the first month of marriage, a couple can face problems/situations that can either positively or negatively affect their relationship, depending on their relationship and how they solve problems together as a couple. Things such as budgeting, having to share a bed and physical space with someone else, less of a social life, going on fewer activities and dates, sharing personal space, and figuring out where to live. This can cause strain on a relationship, but it can also help a couple get to know each other and help them develop a closer bond with one another. In the first year, there can be even more challenges and rewards that impact the relationship. Some issues include whether or not you should have kids and when, how roles and chores are divided in the home, what jobs you each have and should work, where you should live, rules for the home, and just the overall choice of choosing to love your partner. Some ways you can combat this is by discussing where you each stand on divisive issues and being clear about expectations about household roles, traditions, etc. Be open and discuss things with your partner, and have an attitude of great unselfishness. Always remember that you love each other, and that you did not just decide to love each other on your wedding day. Remember to make the choice to love your partner every day. If you keep that in mind, then marriage will not be easy, but it will be worth it.